If I were to write a post about how I am not feeling and pretend everything is roses and sunshine in my life, I wouldn’t be telling you all the truth. This is probably why I haven’t wrote on my blog for about 4 months now. You may not want to read this because you probably won’t agree with me. But if you dare read on.
Following my dream has been the biggest challenge/difficulty I have ever faced in my entire life! There has been SO MUCH UN-needed opposition about my goals in life right now and what I am doing with my time. Countless people like to stick there nose in where it doesn’t really belong. Don’t get me wrong I love advice but not every time I see someone. I don’t like to here the phrase this is what you should be doing every time I get together with someone. Because once I’ve heard it I take it into account, I look at it from my view and theirs, I weigh out all the pros and cons and then I make my decisions. But not on my own, I make them with the guidance of a loving and caring Heavenly Father who knows me and my future better then anyone.
A couple of weeks ago I was asked for the millionth time by someone, “What do you do all day?” Because so many people ask me this question, I wanted to scream at this person and say. “I sit around all day and do nothing. Because I don’t work right now so that’s exactly what I do! I am lazy and yes thank you for looking at me that way.” But instead I kept my cool, and I simply told this person what my week consists of.
I won’t waste my breath by saying that I have got promptings in the temple about what I need to be doing right now, because no one ever wants to listen to those. Everyone discounts that because they have there own opinion. They haven’t prayed about it, and they definitely aren’t me and haven’t got the promptings I have. I have heard the phrase, “Sometimes I think we make promptings up in our own heads.” And if that’s the case then please tell me that you can think these things up in your own head in the temple and that its not the spirit. The one place on earth where Heavenly Father gives his children counsel and guidance.
Here’s a story for you. One day a man named Rafiki (I know funny name for me to pick right? It was the first thing that came to my mind) decided that he wanted to go to college to be a Doctor. “This is going to be the best thing I have ever done.” He thought. “I am going to make millions!” Well Rafiki got into school and went through the motions for about 2 years and got all of his generals done. He then started to question if this was the path he really wanted to take. “Maybe, I want to do something with art?” He then started to seek out exactly what he wanted to do and found out that he loved painting. In fact, he always had. He was just worried that he would never be able to live his dream. So he decided college wasn’t for him and he started to get all kinds of complaints from people around him. “Well what are you going to do.” They said. “You probably won’t make a lot of money.” But instead of listening to this nonsense, Rafiki decided to go on and pursue his dreams anyways. Rafiki didn’t make millions but eventually he was able to provide for his family and sold many paintings through the years. He lived a happy life without becoming a well-paid doctor.
Here is my point I would like to make. Photography was something I tried out that I didn’t like. A lot of people don’t understand that I simply “changed my major.” I am not doing it anymore. I like it but I don’t love it, and I’m sorry to everyone that I have changed my major. I didn’t know that I would have to apologize this much.
I have cheerleaders and I know who they are. If you are not one of them then that’s okay I don’t need you. I have kept my cool for way too long. I need positive, encouraging, uplifting people in my life. I don’t need negative, discouraging, tearing down kind of people. If you can’t accept that photography is not my path and i’m not doing it anymore, then that’s okay I will forgive you and move on. Believe me I wish you all the happiness in everything you do. But I choose to be around the positive not the negative. I can only take so much until I have had enough.
Here is what I am doing right now in case anyone wants to know. Right now I am currently taking care of our apartment. I do all the cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, etc. Everything that goes into making a home a home. 2 hours out of my week are spent at piano and singing lessons. Another 20 hours are spent studying, practicing and putting my whole heart and soul into what I will be doing in a couple months, which is teaching singing lessons. But most importantly I feel like I am preparing myself to be a mother for when the time comes and I can’t think of anything that would make me happier, or be a better career.
I am grateful for a husband who supports me, takes care of me, and loves me despite all of my faults and imperfections. I am grateful for Bryson because when no one else has really been there for me and supported me, through all of this he has. I am thankful for him being such a hard worker. I am thankful that he wants the best for me. That he can see how unhappy photography makes me and how happy music makes me. I am thankful that he cheers me on every day of my life and encourages me to just be me. He is my biggest fan and supporter, he is my biggest cheerleader. I love him with all of my heart and am so thankful that Heavenly Father sent him to me to help me through all of my challenges and difficulties.
I am also thankful for all of the people who have encouraged me to do what I love to do. Thank you for your support and I will continue to be grateful for your love and acceptance.
Here is a list of people I look up to that have lived there dreams and how they have.
Walt Disney- Disney was fired from the Kansas City Star in 1919 because, his editor said, he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.”
J.K. Rowling- She got fired when working at the London office of Amnesty International because she would write stories on her work computer all day long.
Oprah Winfrey-She was an evening news reporter and apparently got fired because she couldn’t sever her emotions from her stories. Eventually she was fired from the producer of Baltimore’s WJZ-TV.
Elvis Presley-After a performance at Nashville’s Grand Ole Opry, Elvis was told by the concert hall manager that he was better off returning to Memphis and driving trucks (his former career).
Thomas Edison-He worked at Western Union where he used to secretly conduct experiments. Then, one night in 1867, he spilled some acid and it ate through the entire floor. He was fired and subsequently decided to just pursue inventing full time.
Steve Jobs-Jobs was fired from his own company.
Lucille Ball-Before her iconic show I Love Lucy, Lucille Ball was considered a failed actress, a B-list actress. So much so that her drama instructors urged her to try another profession.
Michael Jordan-He was cut from his high school basketball team. He once said, “I have missed over 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I have missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”